War is good for Prophets.

Despite what you may think, Junior Tracy and Moon Maid were NEVER an item!


1.  Thou art permitted to make and distribute graven images and holy pictures of thyself, but thou shalt never cause them to be photoshopped nor GIMPed, lest thou be cast down and forced to get a real job.

2.  Thou may maketh as mucho dinero as thy followers are prepared to cougheth up,  but thou shalt not suffer thyself to be commercialised as hast that abomination, the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

3.  As dental bills have become too expensive for mortals, thou shalt refrain from causing excessive gnashing of teeth.  Rending of garments is cool, however, due to cheap clothing imports from Asia.

4.   Thou shalt always ensure that thy followers all sit on the same side of the table when having supper, for the greater glory of portrait painters.

5.  Thou shalt always ensure thy disciples and apostles are licensed by the Board Of Sycophants in their area of operation.  Noteth well, False Gods do not useth comedy sidekicks.

6.  Do not blaspheme, we taketh a dim view of using the names of The Cisco Kid and Pancho in vain.

7.  You may telleth all and sundry of your great victories, but do not releaseth any compilations of your Greatest Hits.  Be proud of your stuff ups, a true False God is known by his failures.

8.  Do not selleth salvation to lawyers.  Hell has to make a living too.

9.  All shrubbery designs should be cleared with the Knights Who Say Ni.

10. Destroy peace, for peace only encourages the atheists.  Live by those imortal words, "Let the wookie win".

© Brian Brett 2011